LIBRARIAN
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22 December 1997:
LOOK WHAT YOUR LITTLE OL' LIBRARIAN FOUND
As Christmas rapidly approaches, a mysterious visitor—one of many to come—leaves a letter for the Librarian on the back stoop of the ARSCC Chimerical Libarry. The anonymous benefactor has been in touch with a Senior Copyright Research Specialist at the Library of Congress. And the letter substantiates The Librarian's earlier discovery that unknown others have written text that is being included in books with the name "L. Ron Hubbard" on them.
From: nobody@zeta.org.au (The Galactic Overlord Remailer) Subject: LOOK WHAT YOUR LITTLE OL' LIBRARIAN FOUND! Date: 1997/12/22 Message-ID: <67kqd7$7gu$1@godzilla.zeta.org.au> Newsgroups: alt.religion.scientology I was just sittin' here, sippin' on egg-nog in the ARSCC Chimerical Library, hummin' a little Christmas ditty, thumbin' through the latest Cosmo, now and again scratchin' daintily at my thigh (I just *love* that weird little goose-bumpy scritchy sound fingernails on nylons make, don't you?), when all of a sudden: BAM, BAM, BAM! I heard this *pounding* at the back door! In *other* words, there arose such a clatter, that I *sprang* from my chair to see *what* was the matter! I made my way through the cloak room (*still* no lightbulb! A-hem!), wondering if it might be that cute ARSCC Sheriff takin' me up on my offer. (I mean, it's *way* too early to be Santa.) I slowly opened the back door and peered around the edge. Nothin'. Nobody. I stuck my head out and looked up and down the alley. Nothin'. Nobody. Just a few light flakes of snow wafting on the cold evening air. Hm, I thought. That's weird. Even for the ethereal world of the ARSCC. Maybe it was McShane trying to execute a search warrant, and he got the wrong alley. Who knows. <SHRUG>. I was just starting to close the door when I happened to glance down. Lying on the stoop, on a light dusting of snow, was a piece of paper. I almost missed it against the white snow. I picked it up, closed the door, and took it inside. I put it on the radiator to dry a bit while I warmed my hands and my taut little tushie, then brought it over to the desk and slipped on my *totally* bookish tortoise-shell glasses. Imagine my surprise. It was a letter to *somebody* from the Library of Congress. Here, you may as well read it yourself: [LIBRARY OF CONGRESS LOGO] (Down the side): LIBRARY OF CONGRESS COPYRIGHT OFFICE 101 Independence Avenue, S.E. Washington, D.C. 20559-6000 "September 23, 1997 "Our reference: [BLACKED OUT] "This refers to your request of recent date. "THE ORGANIZATION EXECUTIVE COURSE: AN ENCYCLOPEDIA OF SCIENTOLOGY POLICY: basic staff v. 0; by L. Ron Hubbard. Appl author: compilation, editorial revisions, some text: Church of Scientology International, employer for hire. Prev. reg. 1975, A 599650. New matter: "compilation, some text, editorial revisions." Registered in the name of Norman F. Starkey as executor of the Estate of L. Ron Hubbard doing business as L. Ron Hubbard Library, effective October 20, 1987 under TX 2-187-253 following publication October 16, 1986 and creation in 1986. "Facts of registration for A 599650 mentioned above are as follows. "THE ORGANIZATION EXECUTIVE COURSE; an encyclopedia of scientology policy. Vol. 0: basic staff volume. By L. Ron Hubbard. New matter: compilation, abridgement & revisions. Registered in the name of L. Ron Hubbard, under A 599650 following publication September 15, 1974. "Your remittance of $20.00 has been applied in payment for this search and report. "(Signature) "Robin L. Coreas "Senior Copyright Research Specialist "Reference & Bibliography Section" Wonder who would drop this off for me? Whoever it was, it looks like Sherman Lenske and company, with Norm's help, have pulled another fast one and put L. Ron Hubbard's name in the title again. <Giggle!> I just can't get *over* that trick--just like with "A New Slant on Life." All those Scientologists lining up with beaming faces to buy *ga-zillions* of dollars worth of books that they think are *by* L. Ron Hubbard. But these new books are really *by* Hubbard AND by people hired by the Church of Scientology, all mixed in together. This is *so smart*! Heck, they can change the contents all they want now! Since "L. Ron Hubbard" is just a trademark, and since they call themselves the "L. Ron Hubbard Library," and since they put his name in the *title*, they can get away with it. Well, I guess that's why *they* are lawyers, and *I'm* just a lowly librarian. <Heavy SIGH>. <TAP, TAP, TAP of pencil, thoughtfully on desk, echoing in the empty chambers of the ARSCC Chimerical Library.> Except for that pesky little matter of fraud. Hm. Let me look that up. I'll just flip through my legal dictionary here. Let's see, "franchise," "fratricide," Here it is! "Fraud." Hm, it says "knowledge of falsity and intention to deceive." Oh, my, my, my. I mean, *I* thought all these books were authored only by L. Ron Hubbard. Didn't you? Wouldn't anybody, the way they are packaged and advertised and sold? Say, none of you went out and spent *money* on one of these books 'cause it had only L. Ron Hubbard's name on the cover, did you? Wonder how many people have, and how much *money* is involved here? Hm, "fraud" also says, "misrepresentation, concealment or nondisclosure of a material fact, or at least misleading conduct, devices, or contrivance." Well, shoot! I wonder how many books and things they've *done* this with? Think I'll go log onto LOCIS and see. Now where's my egg nog? I'll let you know what I find out! Ta-ta! And Merry Christmas! --<The ARSCC Librarian> ---------------------------------------------------------------- *The ARSCC, like its saucy and all-decked-out-for-the-holidays librarian, does not exist. |