LIBRARIAN
WE LOVE THE ARSCC LIBRARIAN!
21 December 1997:
THE LIBRARIAN SAYS *NOT* RECOMMENDED READING
As she's getting into the Christmas spirit and decking out the old ARSCC Chimerical Library, our stalwart Librarian still finds time to ransack the arcane Library of Congress records to help a library patron explore the possibility of a fraud: whether or not books are being sold with the name "L. Ron Hubbard" on them that aren't written exclusively by the author L. Ron Hubbard.
From: nobody@zeta.org.au (The Galactic Overlord Remailer) Subject: THE LIBRARIAN SAYS *NOT* RECOMMENDED READING! Date: 1997/12/21 Message-ID: <67iib1$3j7$1@godzilla.zeta.org.au> Newsgroups: alt.religion.scientology A shy guy (well, his library card just said "Anonymous") wandered into the ARSCC Chimerical Library, bumped into me and made me drop my books. Helping me pick them up, he said, "Say, you're a librarian!" (Thanks for noticin,' masked man.) Then he said: >I bought New Slant On Life from a regular bookstore (I don't go >into the orgs anymore) for a family member and was going to give >it for Christmas, but a friend of mine said this new paperback >version wasn't written by Hubbard. Being *just* the girl who could help him dispel his misgivings, I lured him over to the terminal, clicked my long red nails on the keys, and Telnetted to the Library of Congress. We can't have nasty rumors like that floating around... . Well, dip me in minty chocolate and call me a Christmas bon-bon! The author *ain't* L. Ron Hubbard! The author is "Church of Scientology International!" *Why* are you looking at me with open mouths like that? Is it this dress? I mean, it's low-cut, and it's red and all, but--well, you know, what with it being close to Christmas... Or is it this sprig of mistletoe dangling from my necklace? That's just for fun, silly! Here, I'll show you what I found at the Library of Congress: TITL: A New slant on life / L. Ron Hubbard. IMPR: Los Angeles : Bridge Publications, c1988. PHYS: 206 p. CLNA: Norman F. Starkey as executor of the Estate of L. Ron Hubbard d.b.a. L. Ron Hubbard Library, Los Angeles DCRE: 1988 DPUB: 8Oct88 DREG: 28Nov88 APAU: some text, compilation, paintings used for dustcover art: Church of Scientology International PREV: Prev. reg. 1970, A145211. LINM: NM: "some text, compilation, paintings used for cover art." ECIF: 1/B/L XREF: cL. Ron Hubbard Estate of. SEE L. Ron Hubbard Library, Los Angeles. How do you like *them* apples! (Not THESE apples; *them* apples!) The abbreviation "APAU" means "Name(s) of authors(s) on application." The name "L. Ron Hubbard"--which is a trademark now, controlled by CST through RTC--has been made part of the *title*. How cute! Now "L. Ron Hubbard" can go on the book covers as part of the *title*, and all those Scientology shoppers standing in line to hand over their Christmas cash for this heavily-advertised book will still think L. Ron Hubbard is the sole *author*, and nobody would ever guess! Oh, that bunch of lawyers calling themselves the L. Ron Hubbard Library are just *so* clever. I mean, *I* never would have thought of something like that in just a *ga-zillion* years! They can sell *anything* and put the trademark "L. Ron Hubbard" on it! Of course, the fact that the "DCRE" (Date Created) is two years *after* L. Ron Hubbard died is kind of a give-away, but--shoot, who's going to go snooping around in the Library of Congress to find this stuff out? (Who except your own little sweet Librarian!) Wonder who wrote the "NM" (New Material) that is described as "some text"? Wonder how *much* new text? Wonder why those authors aren't given credit anywhere in or on the book? Wonder, wonder, wonder. Oh, well. Thought you should know that <SIGH> I'm gonna' have to take the "Recommended Reading" sticker off of this book at the ARSCC Chimerical Library. I mean, what good is it *here* if we can't even tell who wrote what! Wonder if some of those big, glitzy, publically-traded bookstore chains still have "Recommended Reading" stickers on *their* copies, it being so close to Christmas? Could somebody hold the ladder steady for me while I climb up here and hang some more mistletoe? "Deck the halls with boughs of holly, fa-la-la-la-fraud, la-la-la fraud." --<The ARSCC Librarian> ----------------------------------------------------------------- *The ARSCC, like its bouncy, festively festooned librarian, does not exist. |