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THE LIBRARIAN ARCHIVES:

13 September 2001:
YOO-HOO! PTSC! About those copyrights PART 1
YOO-HOO! PTSC! About those copyrights PART 2
YOO-HOO! PTSC! About those copyrights PART 3
YOO-HOO! PTSC! About those copyrights PART 4

22 August 2001:
Re: Attention Librarian


5 March 2001:
Re: Question for CL or Librarian


10 April 2000:
Part 1, 1972-1973 FIX AND REPOST
Part 1, 1972-1973 FIX AND REPOST (Continued)
Part 2, 1974-1975 FIX AND REPOST
Part 2, 1974-1975 FIX AND REPOST (Continued)
Part 3, 1976-A FIX AND REPOST
Part 4, 1976-B FIX AND REPOST
Part 5, 1977 FIX AND REPOST
Part 6, 1978 FIX AND REPOST
Part 7, 1979-1980 FIX AND REPOST
Part 8, 1981-1982 FIX AND REPOST
Re: Owen, We Have a Problem

3 March 2000:
Re Part 3, 1976-A

25 February 2000:
PGPed Where the heck have *I* been? From 1972 to 1982 and back!

17 January 1999:
THE LIBRARIAN AND THE LIVING DEAD

8 December 1998:
Re: Urgent to Veritas: Marie

18 November 1998:
LIEBERMAN AND THE LIBRARIAN, PART I
LIEBERMAN AND THE LIBRARIAN, PART II
LIEBERMAN AND THE LIBRARIAN, PART III
LIEBERMAN AND THE LIBRARIAN, PART I—CORRECTED

8 October 1998:
A Message and Picture From The ARSCC Librarian

9 April 1998:
ZED'S "DEAR LIBRARIAN" LETTER

4 March 1998:
ZED, HONEY, I'VE GOT WHAT YOU NEED!
Re: The Missing Ten Months


13 January 1998:
THE LIBRARIAN LOSES IT WITH SHERIFF RON

5 January 1998:
Re: ENTHETA.NET archive: The Librarian
Re: Librarian: riddle me this.....

4 January 1998:
Re: Challenge to Critics and Scientologists Alike
LIBRARIAN CALLING JETA!

30 December 1997:
THE LIBRARIAN'S PRESENT TO LITIGANTS

29 December 1997:
THE LIBRARIAN HAS PRESENTS!
PRESENT TO BOOKBUYERS
PRESENT FOR WILLIAM BARWELL
PRESENT FOR RON'S AMIGO
PRESENT FOR JUSTIN

22 December 1997:
LOOK WHAT YOUR LITTLE OL' LIBRARIAN FOUND!

21 December 1997:
THE LIBRARIAN SAYS *NOT* RECOMMENDED READING!

19 December 1997:
jf05353-A THANK-YOU CARD FROM THE LIBRARIAN
ZED STRUGGLES WITH THE LIBRARIAN
SHERIFF RON INTERROGATES THE LIBRARIAN
THE SHERIFF COMES BACK FOR MORE
RE: ZED STRUGGLES WITH THE LIBRARIAN--NOT!
ZED AND THE SHERIFF GANG UP ON THE LIBRARIAN

17 December 1997:
ZED VS. THE LIBRARIAN-1
ZED VS. THE LIBRARIAN-2
ZED VS. THE LIBRARIAN-3
ZED VS. THE LIBRARIAN-4
ZED VS. THE LIBRARIAN-5
ZED VS. THE LIBRARIAN-6
ZED VS. THE LIBRARIAN-7

15 December 1997:
Challenge to Critics and Scientologists Alike

11 December 1997:
Re: Scientology/IRS Connection


RELATED FILES:

Public Research Foundation Press Release: "HIDDEN TIES BETWEEN IRS AND SCIENTOLOGY REVEALED"

The CST LEGAL PAPERS series


PUBLIC NOTICE:
The files on this site were found in publically available usenet archives and are in the public domain.

13 January 1998:
Re: The Missing Ten Months

Always up for a strip version of "Stump the Librarian," our favorite keeper of the word challenges a poster with the nick of "Simon" to put up or shut up. Someone had anonymously posted an article called "The Missing Ten Months". When Simon called it "an amazing piece of fiction," The Librarian seemed to think Simon had filed it in the wrong section of the ARSCC Chimerical Library—she had filed it in "Reference"—and offered to let him back up his claim. For some reason, Simon never took her up on her most enticing offer. And neither did anyone else. Is it too late—can we play?


From: The Librarian <NOBODY@REPLAY.COM>
Subject: Re: The Missing Ten Months
Date: 1998/03/04
Message-ID: <199803040856.JAA10009@basement.replay.com>
References: <6c0om1$sof$1@newsd-131.iap.bryant.webtv.net>
Newsgroups: alt.religion.scientology


Well, it's almost *just* like Men's-Read-And-Play day here at the
ARSCC Chimerical Library, because we always play "Simon Says." (You
know, like, "Simon Says 'touch your elbows behind your back.'" The
guys are *always* getting me to do *that* one for some reason. Sheesh!
Or, "Simon Says 'touch your heels behind your head.'" I mean,they must
think I'm some kind of *contortionist* or something!) And now
Simon5@webtv.net drops in, and Simon Says:

>"The Missing Ten Months"--by Anonymous--
>an amazing piece of fiction.
>
>I understand that the sequel is going to be "The Missing Ten
>Months of Life it Took To Compose Endless Garbage".
>
>Simon

Why, Simon! Welcome to the ARSCC Chimerical Library! Would you be
willing to come by and lead the ARS Men in "Simon Says" on our next
Men's-Read-And-Play day? I just *know* they would love to play with
you (and, frankly, they are wearing me *out*!).

But, Simon, *I* wouldn't mind having a little fun with *you*, sweetie,
<Wink!>, if you know what I mean. So how about you and I play...

STUMP THE LIBRARIAN!

If you don't know the rules, it's REAL easy.

See, YOU said that "The Missing Ten Months" is fiction. Well, you
know, I read that darn thing, and started checking it out, and I had
to file it in the REFERENCE section here at the ARSCC Chimerical
Library, because--the opening allegation notwithstanding--I couldn't
find ONE DARN *THING* in there that couldn't be backed up with HARD
FACTS. (And, Simon, honey, my knees just go *weak* over HARD FACTS!
They make my softest parts go pert!)

So, Simon, all *you* have to do to STUMP THE LIBRARIAN is give me ONE
statement from "The Missing Ten Months" that you claim is not backed
up by HARD FACT somewhere. Just *ONE*!

Then *I* have to find some documentation to *prove* that the statement
you chose from "The Missing Ten Months" is *accurate* according to
available information.

If I can't, then you have STUMPED THE LIBRARIAN!

Now, I have to make three special rules in this case:

1. You can ONLY pick from the paragraphs that have dates (which is,
like, 95% of the darned thing, so--big deal!).

2. You must exclude the parenthetical "commentary" at the end of some
of the paragraphs, 'cause they're just, like, well, *comments.*

3. You must specifically exclude the opening allegation that "L. Ron
Hubbard was abducted by agents of the United States government." Why?
Because, honey, I am *NOT* with the CIA, FBI, IRS, DOJ, DOD, NSC, CST,
RTC, or any of those other alphabet-soup-groups who would *know*. You
*may* include the rest of that paragraph, since it DOES include a
date.

So, Simon...are you ready to play STUMP THE LIBRARIAN?

I *promise* you I can make it worth your while.

I'll be waiting, Simon, with parted, wet lips and labored breath. Come
on, Simon, honey. Won't you *please* play with me!

                            --<The ARSCC Librarian>

P.S. Zed, Sheriff Ron, David, Ace--*all* you other sexy, studious boys
out there. You *know* I love you all, and that you are welcome to jump
in any time and try to STUMP THE LIBRARIAN! I'll be waiting!

P.P.S. Simon--Just in case you didn't know, STUMP THE LIBRARIAN is a
*strip* game!

---------------------------------------------------------------
*The ARSCC, like its "won't-somebody-play-with-me" Librarian, does not
exist.



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